baby growth

Aug 31, 2010

AM I READY TO BE A PARENT?

If you are asking yourself this question now, chances are you're thinking about it, or you think that time is running out. Doesn't really matter whatever your actual reason is... if you are in your late 20s or early 30s, it's about time you start thinking about parenthood.

The Why
The why is almost as subjective as 'why do I love ice cream'? Personal preferences aside, here are some of the reasons why you are asking yourself if you are ready to be a parent.

1. Your friends are getting married or already posting their babies' 'fresh-out-of-the-oven' photos on facebook.
2. Your friends have started their one/two year hiatus from their usual 'social life' to deal with the needs of parenthood. They don't call it 'biting the dust' for no good reason.
3. You feel that your biological clock is ticking faster than you originally thought it would. Suddenly, 30 is too old an age to get pregnant.
4. Celebrities are already having babies left, right and centre. It was the latest trend two years ago but hey, if they're doing it...
5. You hear horror stories about how scary childbirth and pregnancy is the older you get. Check out my post on how not easy it is to get pregnant if you haven't already.

The impact (on your life)
Parenthood is not for the faint-hearted; no, seriously, I'm not kidding. It's also not for those who hasn't gotten over 'having a life'. With kids around, you don't get to sleep well, you keep looking at the time whenever you are out with friends, you pay through your nose to get someone else to watch over your kid, you worry whenever they do a bad job which would mean you need to look for a replacement; the list goes on... 4evar!

But as with the cons, there are pros too with parenthood. 

You learn to be more tolerant and patient with adults since you get all the practice when you deal with your kid(s). You grow up overnight, take on more responsibilities like cleaning their butts and having daily encounters with human excrements. You take better care of yourself so that you will be around longer to see your kids grow up, get married and have their own kids. You learn to love. You learn to forgive. When you do get some sleep, you sleep with a baby, like a baby. You become a more careful person, who plans ahead, who uses checklists, who drive within the speed limit, who buys stuff at a whim, who sheds the stress that you bring home from work the moment your kids call you mama or kisses you goodnight...

Simple pleasures of parenthood can easily outweigh the hardships. They are the reasons for siblings.

The how
Now, this part will need a little bit of education. No, not sex education. That part you already know from other parts of the Internet - we won't go there - but I'm talking more about knowing what you should prepare for before you get pregnant. 

You should be as healthy as possible at least a full year before getting pregnant. You should get your cycle straightened out and stabilised. You should stop smoking, drinking, taking drugs that are not prescribed by a doctor for an illness that could have been avoided, partying too late at night until you live on three hours of sleep daily (believe me you will get less in the first year you become a parent) and lastly you should be sure that your relationship with your partner is stable enough for the both of you to pull through the rough patches together. It is of course, easier said that done, but not necessarily undoable. Then again, if you are unwilling to give all that up, maybe parenthood is still not a zone you want to be in yet.

Lastly, the kids
They will be cheeky, naughty, mischievously fun, make you pull your hair one minute and then make you ooo and aaaa the next. They're wonderful creatures that absorb everything (good and bad) like a sponge and at times are a walking, talking mirror reflecting who you are without consciously faking it or disguising it. You'd be surprised what you see in their behaviour and their choice of words. You may not like it, but again it is a reminder of how you can change and try to be better. For what is the use of a parent, if not to guide children into society in the form of useful individuals who can and will do their part to help better the community for the greater good... or make bloody good ice cream. Yay!

Dream big!


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