TAKING A MASTER

It's been a while since my last blog entry and my fingers are itching to churn out words once again. Having no other familiar outlet to release this urge, I return to my abandoned blog to resume my writing and to further update my online diary that will be read most often by no one but the future me. It doesn't sound so bad despite how I put it.


So the first semester of my MPS studies have been completed and it turned out better than I had expected: the people I met, the things I've learned, the experiences experienced... it was well worth the months I was there. Results-wise I did a lot better than I had expected. At least I could write in the sms I sent to my dad that I topped the class. It was hardly a win but at least I did my best and I was lucky enough to be able to reap the rewards. 


Others were not so lucky.


I felt that while it was important to be active in class, it was more important - at least for me - to participate and be involved in with your classmates, your lecturers, the lessons and the assignments. Back when I was studying for my undergraduate degree, I only "performed" when it came to presentations. Speaking in public, presenting my thoughts was a skill acquired during my late secondary school years. They have brought me far, given me confidence that would make me do relatively well academically. I'd never thought that it would also help in securing good results for my Masters. 


You see, most of the time the lecturers for a Masters programme here in Malaysia don't really want to fail the students. They are not there to be tested; they are there to gain knowledge. And they can do that by doing assignments, group or individual, and by reading a lot and through discussions with course-mates. Exams are a formality, at least concept-wise. It is hardly a good measure of how 'good' a student is by for the lack of a better measuring system, the Malaysian government is content to be contented with what works now. 


I gave my all in my assignments, but it wasn't the 'assignments' that were the hard part... it was making the other group mates commit more to the assignment than what they can (or want to). 


Managing people is hard and it gets really hard when they are not the same age or wavelength as you. If they are older, you have to plea to them, carefully selecting the right words to convince them to do this or that, if they are younger, you will hear the words 'chill' a lot and on the night before the submission deadline, do not expect to get any sleep at all. Everyone works in their own mysterious way and sometimes it works out, and sometimes it doesn't.


For two of my closest friends for this course, it didn't work out as well as they thought. I am glad that we are all going through to the next semester without having to retake any of the papers but having seen them work so hard for their assignments, I really wanted to be happy with their results, like I am. But that's just the naive me talking. Besides, they have probably forgotten about the results by now. 


And now on to the dissertation. I must read. And read. And read now...

WHY BERSIH 2.0 IS IMPORTANT FOR MALAYSIA

I am not affiliated with any political party. I am only loyal to my family, my husband, my daughter and my parents, not necessarily in that order. 

Today, in my country, Malaysia, people took to the street in peaceful demonstration to ask for a reform of the electoral process in Malaysia, a democratic country. 

The government did all it could to stop people from attending the rally: conducted road blocks, rejected permits for the rally - making it illegal, put up road closures on the night before the rally, shut down light rail transit stations, issued warnings via mainstream media, news stations, the mainstream dailies, on radio, via advertisements to ask that nobody attend the rally. 

And what happened? This.

 Click for source.

Visit bersih.org or the facebook page for Bersih 2.0 for more photos, but while you're here, here is what the rally was all about.

Click for source

This has gone far enough. The powerful bully the weak. They pull strings and 'mismanage funds' and while many Malaysians are still oblivious of how they are being cheated out of their honest earnings by the corrupted, I am lending my support to the Bersih cause because of my daughter. We are still a long way from being a corrupt-free country, but today I learn of a quote that I will remember for the rest of my life.

If there must be trouble let it be in my day, that my child may have peace - Thomas Paine.

Peace. [Yeah, that would be nice.]

WHAT FRESH GRADUATES NEED TO KNOW ABOUT STARTING THEIR CAREER

So you've just graduated and want to know the winning strategies of getting that job. Read up on how to write a winning resume, how to score points during the interviews, what questions to expect, what answers to prepare and practise, practise, practise! 

If you want tips that could help you tip the scales when it comes to scoring that job (not just the interview), read on. 
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Here are some tips of what you should keep an eye out for and what you can do on your part to minimize negative impacts to a good start in your career.

From hero to zero
From the pinnacle of the academic world to the grassroots of the working world, the transition of a university graduate to 'fresh' graduate is a highly demoralizing rite of passage for any professional and would-be professionals. Everyone has to start from the bottom up and unless you are taking over the family business, chances are you have to jump through all the hoops and hurdles like everybody else. 

The good news is everyone starts from a level playing field. Sure, you may have a 3.0 CGPA and that is a far cry from the straight-A, 4-pointer candidate sitting two seats away from you in the interview waiting room but here's the thing: employers want a wholesome candidate, not just 'students' who can study well. 

What employers (really) want in a candidate:
Once you become a 'candidate', that means that the 'graduate' label has been taken out of the equation, which translates to this: everything else that you did not think mattered before, matters now. Here are some traits (in no particular order) employers want in you, that you may have already been brainwashed to think was not essential in securing that job offer:
(a) An eagerness to learn
(b) A proactive attitude
(c) The patience to listen
(d) Knowing next-to-nothing and not ashamed to say it
(e) Hardworking
(f) Has a passion for something other than the monetary gain
(g) Knows what the job requires - like the back of your hand
(h) Knows how to communicate effectively

The fact that these are things employers look for in you, but you have not been told in university to polish the hell out of is the main disconnect between the products of tertiary institutions, and the options for filling the vacancies in industries. Ironically, I'm referring to you here. 

Here is a breakdown of the traits listed above and examples to help carry the point home.
(a) An eagerness to learn
Employers do not want candidates to come in and teach them what to do. They also do not want candidates to come in and just sit there waiting for 'someone senior' to teach them what to do. What they want is someone who is eager to learn and who will go forth and learn. They want individuals who study the literature, theories, practical results, experiments, feedback and more; they connect with people who can help them with their questions; they read the manuals, the reports; and most importantly, they ask the right questions. 
In short, they are proactive.

(b) A proactive attitude
Many people do not understand proactive-ness, and strangely enough fresh graduates are extreme antonyms to the word 'proactive'. Being proactive means to go the extra mile to finish the job; to go beyond the call of duty; to give the person who asked you to do the initial job a compelling reason to come back to you and give you more jobs (that is how you get paid actually, so if 'more' work scares you, just quit and go herd goats somewhere. Everyone will be a lot happier). 

So when someone asks you to deliver a report on office punctuality, Monday afternoon by 12pm, don't just hand in the report on time, and wait to receive the next task. In the report, you should have given the full analysis, cite your references, anticipate and answer the next task in line that is influenced by the delivery of your report. You should be the master of that topic and the person who initially handed you the task should be asking you questions that only you can answer because you have done so much research on that topic you alone control the outflow of that universe of knowledge. 

However, as all office environments are different, there is a chance that the report is totally useless to the supervisor you gave it to you. Double however, it is usually something that has to be done and you should use it as a way to leave a good impression with your superiors. That's when they will be eager to reciprocate and talk to you, to deem you worth teaching and helping, or better yet, to teach like a jedi master would his apprentice. When that happens, listen.

(c) The patience to listen
Many fresh graduates think that because they have a university degree, they are in the perfect position to be telling people how things should have worked. Newsflash: in the working world, things work according to what the boss thinks will work. Never mind if your boss is loony, misinformed, calculative or just downright ignorant, he pays your salary and because of that he has the right to govern the way his company is run. The same goes to female bosses, most of the time, under tighter and stricter regimes. 
Be prepared to have your world turned upside down, shut the hell up and listen to your colleagues. And when something does not make sense to you, admit you don't understand it and people will come running to explain to you.

(d) Knowing next-to-nothing and not ashamed to say it
The worst thing a fresh graduate can do is say "I know". I know, you have to tell them that you know the latest statistical methods to deliver the results of this project or you know how to run the spectrometer or else you won't be getting the job, but that is about as far as you should go when it comes to telling people the depths of your knowledge. 
Truth is, as a fresh graduate, all you know are the theories behind how things work. People in the working world have tried and tested most methods and have the results to prove why each method fails or succeeds, regardless of what the textbook says. 
If you say "I know" to these people, they'd think you have all the answers, and will be unwilling to share the latest news and/or updates in their field with you. You will have more to lose and will have to work harder to gain the same insights that you could have easily gotten from speaking to an engineer with 20 years of experience under his belt, and who is willing to spill his guts to you over a cup of coffee.

(e) Hardworking
But this is not to say that hard work should not be involved. Many multinational corporations expect their fresh graduate employees to work twice as hard as their seniors, spend more time at their desks and more weekends in the office than anybody else. How else can you keep up with the rest of your colleagues? How do you get out of doing that? What? You have a social life to keep up? If you have to choose between spending time at your job and spending your time in a club drinking your brain cells away then perhaps that passion for your job is missing from your life. Being miserable in a job you do not like, will, kill, you.

(f) Has the passion for the job
Of course, I was speaking figuratively when I say that you will die from your job but how many times have you seen on facebook statuses from friends who are already working, that they are 'miserable' at their job, that they are staying in the office during the weekends, that they haven't seen the latest 3D movie because they didn't realize that the movie had been out for weeks which was as long as they had been away from any source of entertainment. 
It sounds sad but the truth is some people relish at the idea of getting to stay back at the office to get their work done, having the opportunity to lunch and dinner with senior executives who have plenty of great advice to share with them, and to know not of any other happiness other than to finish their project well within the budget and deadline given. These people have the passion to flourish in their chosen field and it is this innate characteristic in them that pushes them to learn everything from scratch about their job and what entails.

(g) Knows what the job requires - like the back of your hand
Unlike the neutral emotion of finding that mole at the back of your hand, passionate workers have a great affinity to discovering new things about their work. The feeling is almost euphoric, splashed with splotches of marvel -- and humility at the thought of still finding things that they did not know.
Not everyone has this. 
In fact, most graduates make the mistake of thinking that they moment they get their degrees, they can stop learning. These are the kinds of employees that stop growing the moment they start working. And they are the hardest to communicate with since everything they know is 'correct' and does not need any more improvements. 

(h) Knows how to communicate effectively
You can only improve if you know how to communicate effectively and appropriately. Using the right words via the right means (no text speak in emails please) and speaking with humility to co-workers, superiors, bosses, executives, clients and subordinates (eventually) can get you far. 

Being bilingual (or trilingual) is a great advantage but try to at least master one language, and it doesn't even have to be English. China is set to be a great economic leader in the next decade or so, and they have their own version of the English language that a native English speaker can't make heads or tails of. Lingua francas change all the time, who can predict the next biggest language out there? 

And to gauge how well you need to know a language: try to finish a novel in that language. If you can, you are set for gold. Bear in mind that programming languages do not count in this context.  
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Take every piece of advice thrown your way with a pinch of salt (including what you are reading here). It may or may not apply to you and your work place, and along your career you will meet people who will directly or indirectly teach you the ways of the world. Best of luck and always stay positive.

TIPS ON POINTS TO CONSIDER WHEN BUYING YOUR CONDO UNIT

In the past week, I have caught news that four of my friends, from university or school, are getting married! I guess everyone feels pressured into making a commitment once they start hitting an age-milestone. Either that, or they realize that it is time to start a family, and buy their own home.

Staying on course with the posting, if you are looking to buy a condo unit, here are a few reminders and tips to buy the right condo unit for you. Not that there are any wrong units - of course the developer is set on selling every single built unit - but you might want to hear me out (or read on) to find out how you can avoid getting less than what you deserve:

Here are the questions you want to ask the salesman or developer when asking about a condominium unit you want to purchase:

1. Where maintenance units are located
This includes the garbage chute (that is available on every floor), the garbage bin (it's usually at one of the corners), the TNB generator room etc.

2. Where the staircase / lifts are
My unit is the second closest to the emergency staircase and because we live on the first floor, we usually take the staircase instead of the lift (which is in the middle of the building) to our car at the carpark. If you think I'm lucky, imagine how terrible my moving day was (glad that's over). Oh, and it is not really good for your front door to be facing the staircase, bad luck for the owner, not that there is no way of rectifying it, one fengshui matter or another, but if you can avoid it...?

3. Where the facilities are:
Particularly where the swimming pool is because it can be really really noisy during the evenings or the weekends since that's when the kids will come with their visiting cousins and college bros to try out the pool/jacuzzi. Invest in really good sound proof windows and/or doors if this is unavoidable.

4. Where your balcony or living room is facing.
For high-rise dwellers, the view is something that is really really important (why else would I pay this much for? Conversations about the weather?). Even if at the current time, your counterpart units at the ground or first floor are facing a back road or undeveloped areas (hills and forests), that can change really quick within the next four to five years. The unit I got is already blocked by another apartment so my view is shot even from the day I bought my unit. My neighbours who had a nicer view facing some greens in the other direction are a bit luckier - but not for long as they are building another condominium unit that will totally screw up the view all the way up to at least the fifteenth floor. Part and parcel of owning a condo. Remember this rule: If there is space for development, there will be.

5. Details that might not seem important when you are buying the unit, but are.
~ where is the condo facing in relation to the sun (If you don't think that is important, you definitely have never been awaken by the hot sun shining down with vengeance on your eyes)
~ what you are getting from your developer (the tiling of the bathroom all the way to the ceiling, water heaters, dryers, floor tiles, Astro satellite connection policies, etc)
~ Maintenance fees (how much, when payment is due)
~ Parking lots and vehicle entry cards (are the lots covered or not; how far are the lots from your unit; if you get two, will they be placed together?)
~  (for security purposes)
~ Security policies (How easy or hard is it for friends or strangers to gain entry)
~ Visitor parking (are there any?)
~ Where the mailbox is
~ Renovation rules (some condos are very strict with what can be renovated and what can't)

House hunting is no laughing matter and I wouldn't know what I'd do without my husband and his discerning eye (and gut feeling) for good property buys. But with the right questions asked at the right time to the right person, you can minimize the risk of investing in the wrong property. Best of luck.

Mama Sing

Sort-of Book Review: Only Time Will Tell

I have always been a fan of Jeffrey Archer's books. With the exception of The Gospel According to Judas, which I've just noticed after reading through his list of works to confirm that I have read all his books, I have almost read all of his books, which includes his latest, Only Time Will Tell aka The Clifton Chronicles.

I finished reading this in two days, which I also did with the last Harry Potter book 

...but with more enthusiasm and satisfaction

I like Archer's storytelling. He makes every sentence count. I say this because in most of the books I read, I usually skip physical descriptions of the characters, the environment, the negligible room where they are going to have sex in... my point is, it's all pointless, serving no use except to be page fillers. My idol doesn't do that and even though almost all other novelists do that (for whatever reasons except practical ones), he simply does not give a *bleeb* and tells his own story his way.

Back to the review: 

It's almost impossible to 'spoil' Archer's books, because the fun in reading it is the journey and not just a single point in the last chapter which wraps everything up. Nonetheless, his signature twist-in-the-tale has always been a novelty that I look for in novels, of which (unlike a certain film-maker who has lost the ability to put in to his movies no more), Archer never fails to use blow everyone's mind.  

But in this book his twist takes a backseat. It's an amazing piece of work, showcasing ingenious story telling skills and his ability to get into the minds of so many of his characters that you find it hard to believe that they are not alive somewhere in the world. 

One thing I can spoil for you is that he retells various parts of the story; you will be reading about repeated scenes and issues but it will be fun, because it is from different points of view. And I don't mean like in an OCD way where there are several points of views in the same sentence, or in the same paragraph, or even the same page. Everyone tells their POV in chapters, and because Archer does his homework, none of it clash [Yeah, I am challenging you, yes you, to find flaws in his book]. And nobody can pull that off, but Jeffrey Archer.

What started out as a boy's journey to figure out what happened to his father who went missing from his and his mother's life one day, without a trace, would spell out a series of events that would leave him and you speechless. [It's a fairly new book and honestly, I do not want to ruin it for you, and I swear this on my hard covered Only Time Will Tell, which set me back about 100 bucks but it was worth it.]

*But if you still want a review on the book rather than trust my word for it (good move), here's a review from Pam Norfolk.*

And now for some good news: this will be a five-book saga (it ain't called a chronicle for being a 386-page book), with the second book The Sins of The Father well into its eighth draft, and supposedly picking up where the first book left off.

I can't wait!

PATIENCE IS VIRTUE WITH KIDS

If you do not have the patience to deal with a child, make it.

Yes, make patience, form it, develop it, rough it out. No matter how hard it is going to be for you, you really need to be patient with your children especially during their pre-vocab periods.

Here are three instances when I took the time to really try to understand my child (who turns two at the end of April) rather than lose my temper with her and it solved every mystery!

(A) Mystery #1: A squinting matter

Eva has been watching TV really close up lately. I did not understand why she had to do that every single time her favourite programmes were on. Was it because she wants to be upclose and personal with her favourite characters? Does she have eyesight problems? Hearing problems? 

We had several screaming matches because of it (she was the one screaming most of the time): "Sofa, Eva. Go sit at the sofa. Please don't watch TV so upclose. You will be wearing glasses by kindergarden." "kappa kappa nehno nah? NO!!!!" 

Sigh.

Apparently the real answer was revealed only when I took the time to sit down with her and watch a show, this time it was Mickey Mouse Clubhouse (highly recommended for toddlers).

  

The sofa is a good six to eight feet away from the TV. The discrepancy is due to the sofa being shifted front and back as it is not propped up against a wall. Up above, we installed a false panel with six appropriately placed lights to evenly light up the living room. It was eventually identified as the culprit to her fascination with the TV in close vicinity. 

The lights were making it difficult for her to see the TV screen! Even I was having a hard time absorbing the bright colours of the show AND the lights positioned at the two corners of my eyes. Ever since I swapped the lights for a row of lights shining behind the sofa (as opposed to in front of the sofa), she has kept herself to the middle of the living room or right at the far end where the sofa is. 

(B) Mystery #2: Scary doors

Eva was making a fuss of sleeping by herself, as in without me sitting right next to her and doing nothing but watch her drift into dreamland - it was unusual to say the least. She would be frightened (hands tapping on her chest and saying "pa pa" which was the signal for being scared) to be in our bedroom, with the lights out or with the door closed. Now before you freak yourself out with stories of the paranormal, believe me, the real answer was far from that.

I had just submitted a project within its deadline and found some time (and the need!) to take a nap. Hence, I took one, with Eva, on our bed. Suddenly I heard thumping noises coming from the attached bathroom. The noises were caused by the low pressure inside the bathroom, where we kept two bathroom windows slightly opened to clear the air of fumes and other odors, when it gets windy around our condo. 

Eva immediately sat up and did the pa pa signal and I figured out that it was the noises from the bathroom door that caused all that fear of taking naps during the afternoon. I put a piece of towel or cloth to stop the door from shutting and the noise were also muffled.

Eva slept really well after that.

(C) Mystery #3: Playing with water

Eva was really testing me the last three days during bath time. She refuses to let me wash her hair, or dry it afterwards. She also refuses to leave the bathroom after we were done with her bath. Lastly, she kept playing with the water that was rushing towards the drainage pipe, dirty water that were cleansed off her body and hair. 

She would cry and throw tantrums in front of the bathroom for a long time, half an hour of pure screaming and never-ending tears. When I finally couldn't take it, I let her dad take over the bathing for awhile, which he did, without a single tear from Eva. 

As I observed the way he did it, I figured that we both had different approaches to giving Eva her bath. Mine was quick and easy, minimizing the use of water and getting her out as quick as possible so that she won't catch a cold. His was a lingering time in the bathtub with a lot of fun and plenty of time for him to dry her hair properly before she leaves warmth of the bathroom.

While both our methods had its strengths and weaknesses, Eva obviously prefers her dad's more fun bathing methods and therefore throws tantrums whenever I don't follow his method. I also had to explain to my husband why I don't want to. "What if we had to take baths at other places for example, like our parent's houses, where there are no bathtubs? And what do you think about using so much of their water for a simple bath for a toddler?" His response: "We can always use the basins to wash clothes in" and "Why won't they let a toddler take a fun bath?" 

The jury is still out on that but that's another story altogether.

So if your toddler is giving you a hard time, throwing tantrums left right and centre, take a few minutes out of your busy schedule and just sit down with them or go through the process together with them, view things from their perspective, and you might be able to put these tantrums to rest in no time. 

best of luck! - Mama Sing.